FeistyMind

  • The end of this day

    The day was like any other. Just a regular day with a crappy schedule.Just another appointment with my mother at the hospital.Just a small hope that maybe this latest disease progression was a reversible mistake. Well, it is not. Today marks the day she is officially in palliative care.You’re welcome.We manage pain and discomfort now,…

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  • Blank page

    After months of circling around the idea like a suspicious cat, I bought Scrivener yesterday. Everyone said it was the tool for writers. And still, I resisted for as long as possible (more than a year, to be honest) — partly because I’m stubborn, partly because I thought I could get away with working through…

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  • Sitting with discomfort

    Being able to sit with discomfort should get you medals. And choosing to surrender control and sit there anyway, not knowing the end, that’s next-level bravery. This is technically a 2026 problem, but now that I’ve seen it on the horizon, I need time to think. To overthink. To spiral a little and prepare myself…

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  • Joint words

    There are sentences that take up residence in my mind. Authors, books, lyrics – they put a string of words together and suddenly it becomes essential. I can’t live without that phrase echoing inside me, I’m done for. It’s boardline obsessive how much I think about certain sentences. And the worst (or best) part? I…

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  • Out of the confort zone

    I hate it with all my being — the waiting, the buildup, the excruciating preparation. The more space I give it in my head, the bigger and uglier it becomes. So I try to downplay it. I tell myself it’s not a big thing, that it’s fine. But then the anxiety settles in anyway, staying…

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  • There’s no title

    Maybe, just maybe, I need to let the words out.But words shouldn’t be released.Words should stay inside, for the sake of everyone else. I could scream.I could let everything spill out from my clogged pores.But then again… adulthood.My most detested hood, without a doubt. Being an adult means knowing the consequences, and worse, caring about…

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  • And then you blink

    And more than a month passed without writing — at least, without writing here. Over the past few weeks, I’ve been deep in the Story Genius practice. I now have a nearly complete blueprint — in bullet points and ideas — for not one but two books. I’m currently working through the final exercise: drafting…

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  • Premonitions

    I would not call it exactly a premonition, but sometimes I know, somewhere in my gut, that certain things are going to happen. I knew the day my mother tried to kill herself. I was at the bottom of the stairs, all dressed up to have my birthday lunch with my father, and when she…

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  • Scotland

    A part of my soul resides in Scotland, it’s now my belief. After another 5 days of driving in the Highlands, I can confirm this will not be the last time I do it. Actually, this was the second time of many that will follow. It is unclear at this point whether it is the…

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  • Soulful lines

    There’s nothing more life-consuming than an idea when you only have one.It’s scary, really, the time you spend thinking about the same thing over and over again until there’s nothing else.

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