life

  • Out of the confort zone

    I hate it with all my being — the waiting, the buildup, the excruciating preparation. The more space I give it in my head, the bigger and uglier it becomes. So I try to downplay it. I tell myself it’s not a big thing, that it’s fine. But then the anxiety settles in anyway, staying

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  • Premonitions

    I would not call it exactly a premonition, but sometimes I know, somewhere in my gut, that certain things are going to happen. I knew the day my mother tried to kill herself. I was at the bottom of the stairs, all dressed up to have my birthday lunch with my father, and when she

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  • Scotland

    A part of my soul resides in Scotland, it’s now my belief. After another 5 days of driving in the Highlands, I can confirm this will not be the last time I do it. Actually, this was the second time of many that will follow. It is unclear at this point whether it is the

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  • Soulful lines

    Nothing can crush your soul faster than an eight-hour corporate strategy meeting.

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  • Soulful Lines

    Old objects bring me solace—small bits of memories encapsuled by hard exteriors; the hourly chime of the pendulum clock, the aluminum butter dish from my grandparents’ summer house, the ’80s coffee cups from my parents’ wedding gifts, the hundred portraits spread over all home surfaces. I like to be surrounded by it, the nostalgia, the

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  • Clichés

    Nobody tells you.Nobody tells you that putting yourself first means putting others second, by definition. And for a lifetime people pleaser like me, that is a feat. A feat I am learning, but it takes time. Also, nobody tells you that accepting yourself as you are (another lovely cliché) is more difficult than it seems.

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  • Soulful lines

    I lived to feel, just like an emotional junkie, until it hurt too much. So I start living for what I should feel; emotions suppressed, all in control. It also failed spectacularly. Now I am learning to accept that I should live for my gut feeling, however scary that may be.

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  • Drive by Kate Stewart

    Somehow, I thought it was a good idea to give fantasy a break. I cannot say I regretted it; I can only say this one hit too close to home. So much so that I read and re-read it after, unable to move on from it. There are some ways to love that get imprinted

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  • Soulful lines

    The concept of time never ceases to amaze me. In the same second that you wish it to move faster, you miss what you are already losing. There’s no winning.

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  • Updates on the book and some lessons learned. With the end of Act I almost complete, it was time for a pause and regroup. Counting words is not enough anymore; a sum of cells does not translate into a being, after all. Therefore, many other ingredients are required. Planning: One of the most challenging things

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